Awakening in Five Stages
This genesis of waking will ultimately look like whatever is needed in order for the awakening to occur for that individual. We must understand that this is a natural evolution of the human being, of our soul - everyone will experience an awakening, its just a matter of when, and in which lifetime (ha!).
Awakening. What is this exactly? How do I know if I am awakening? If you are reading this, I would say its safe to say you are in it - you are on the path! At the risk of oversimplifying this altogether, awakening is a deep knowing that the reality you are living in is not as it should be or what is true is not the physicality around you. Your consciousness - your Self is essentially waking up to find the physical is not Real.
This waking can show up in life in a myriad of ways. It can show up as dis-ease in the body, it can be a feeling that we are more than our body, it can feel like the person you are showing up as isn’t reflecting who you should be, it can happen through the use of psychedelics or plant medicine, or it can happen spontaneously. This genesis of waking will ultimately look like whatever is needed in order for the awakening to occur for that individual. We must understand that this is a natural evolution of the human being, of our soul - everyone will experience an awakening, its just a matter of when, and in which lifetime (ha!). At this part of my journey, and having read many other accounts of spiritual awakening, I’ve come to understand there are 5 Stages of Awakening process. So let’s dive in!
The first stage is what I call the Asleep Stage. This is where we believe we are what we think - there is absolutely no separation from our thoughts and the substance of our being. For some of us, we are seeking only physical pleasures - wealth, sex, notoriety, addictions - all the dopamine hits. We are incredibly enmeshed in relationships and many of us are energetically bound to others by people pleasing pleasing or bullying. This is our Ego running the show! Eventually, all of these aspects of life will come to a head within the individual. Why? Because they are limited.
Behind these pleasure points is a constant fear of lack. “There is only so much of these things to go around” or, for those who overindulge, “there is so much to procure, I need to get it all. “ The idea that in order to win, someone or something else has to lose, or “I need to give up something to win”. “In order to feel alive, I need more.” Even writing this out I hear the sound of iron cages slamming down onto concrete - it feels cold, scary, and isolating. For those who are not yet at the awakening path (one could argue these would be young souls), some could be blissfully thriving (in their ignorance) in this stage. But for the souls on a path of spiritual awakening, this is an unsustainable way of living.
This leads to the Initiation Stage - or what is commonly known as the Dark Night of the Soul. Most who go through this will experience a loss of everything they have known, and so mourn the life one was leading. I know this can sound super vague and overdramatic so let me share my experience.
When I was in the Asleep Stage, I understood my thoughts to be me. Every thought of shame, guilt, anger, fear, self-loathing, happiness, affinity - I understood these internal dialogues as who I was. On top of that I was incredibly disillusioned by the relationships in my life - including with myself. I didn’t know who I was - at that point I had built relationships that were based on superficial behavior and not on genuine connection or based on my authentic self. I was stuck in a toxic-relationship that I was frantically holding onto. Altogether I was living to people please, had incredibly debilitating social anxiety, and to cope, I was self-medicating and became addicted to stimulants and alcohol. At some point I realized I couldn’t live like that anymore.
After I allowed myself to feel this as unsustainable, things moved quickly. I broke off the relationship in the evening one day and 12 hours later, was moved out and staying in a hotel. With a help of a friend I found a place to lease a few week later and essentially disappeared from that life. This was a huge loss whether I fully realized it or not. Looking back I can see I had gone through stages of grief (a topic of another blog). Everything I had thought that made me who was, I set on fire. Nothing really changed in respect of progressing to the next stage for a long time. I was still looking for a sense of security from life in all the wrong places. I was absolutely still self-medicating to survive and I was in this stage for a long time - about a year or so.
As per everything with spirituality, this varies from person to person. And whats more is sometimes Spirit will send you a lifeline - someone or something to help pull you out of chaos. Whether this is the case for you or not, it doesn’t matter - awakening unfolds according to what is needed for each person. Spirit will send who and what is needed to aide you. Once you have come out of this storm and have your sea legs, what do you do after? You look for answers.
This is the Seeking Stage. At this point, having understood that we know nothing (LOL), we are spurned to absorb as much spiritual material as quickly as possible. Researching different spiritual modalities, figuring out what resonates, and figuring out a spiritual practice, or sadhana, naturally become the focus of life. **To be honest, I don’t believe we “graduate” from this stage, but how I have experienced this, is that the information we are exposed to works on us. As soon as the knowledge is felt in our system, there is a natural unfolding, an opening up to more knowledge from within. This is not purely a result of an external experience, this a combination of academic study and self-reflection, inquiry, and contemplation. That being said, I strongly believe that those who follow the paths of self-development and psychology are entering the awakening path as well whether the individual realizes it or not. Most people who look to these modalities are trying to understand how to solve their dis-ease and suffering, ultimately, through study and reflection. Through this cultivating of spiritual knowledge, one is introduced to concepts of Shadow and Soul Retrieval work.
This begins the Shedding Stage of Awakening. In Sat Yoga this is called the Slaying of Demons. Through self-reflection we start to examine our compulsions and tendencies and bring them to the surface to integrate. The result of this work, what we call Shadow Work, is Soul Retrieval, or integration. We begin to heal the wounded parts of us and reestablish our true Self - the self untouched by the influence of this physical world.
As we start to heal ourselves we are more sensitive to our energy and the energy of others. Our relationship dynamics start to change, become distant, or end altogether. In energetic terms, you are no longer a match to those people around you. In more matter of fact terms, as you start to reclaim more of who you are the more unpalatable you become to others. This can be painful and as a result can create their own grieving process to but in the end you will be distilling you relationships to those that serve and no longer take from you.
What’s more is your intuition will whisper to you to follow certain interests, and by doing so you will start to learn what it is that brings you joy, and ultimately, what you feel you were put on this Earth to do - your purpose!
This brings us to the last Stage of Awakening - Living Authentically. This is where our work, how we conduct ourselves, our embodiment, are fully aligned with our true nature. Where purpose becomes our work and our daily expression. I will tell you now, I am still in the process of reaching this stage. And like the Seeking and Shedding stage, I don’t believe we are ever “done” Living Authentically, but we deepen our expression of this in life. Living Authentically is not without living in service of others in some capacity. This is integral to true spiritual development. Don’t stress about this though - your contribution will become evident through discovering your purpose! It is a natural progression of a Spiritual Awakening.
The biggest piece of advice I can give is to remain open to the waves of change. You will reach the shore that is meant for you. Follow the flow of your intuition. Invest in the things that inspire you. That is Spirit leading you toward what and where you are meant to be. Until next time!
